Thank you for your continued prayers for our family.  I’m enjoying my “off week” from treatment – my last chemo was on Monday of last week – and my next one is next Monday.

I was able to preach on Sunday at Sonrise Church, though it was not one of my best efforts – which is disappointing to me. Our people were very gracious to me – but I was “off” my normal game – and most folks could tell!

The weeks I have my treatment have taken more out of me than I expected – making it a bit hard to “get going” each day – and struggling with my energy level to stay as focused as I am used to when I work.  Everyone is encouraging me to not worry about it, but I don’t like it when I can’t give my best.  Perhaps it is just my pride – pray for me as I seek to follow Micah 6:8 on a daily basis to “DO JUSTICE, LOVE MERCY, and WALK HUMBLY with God.”  Whatever happens in my health, I want to honor the Lord and finish well!  It has been discouraging to me these last few weeks.  Not trying to whine – just trying to be honest!  Appreciate your prayers for that!

I would like to ask you to keep praying for my family, especially our daughter Stephanie and her husband Kyle who are expecting their first child later this year.  They recently learned their yet-to-be born baby has spina bifada.  They have discovered that Stephanie is a candidate for prenatal surgery that allows a neurosurgeon to repair the baby’s spine while still in the womb which has proven to provide better results than post-delievery surgery.  Stephanie and Kyle have developed a blog that details their story here:  http://siloampool.blogspot.com/

As you can imagine, this has added to the grief in our family.  But we still believe God is good and we are putting our trust in Him!  Kathy and I hope to drive to Nashville later this month to be with Stephanie during her recovery from this surgery at Vanderbilt – and then later in November when they deliver in Denver.  Please pray for Stephanie & Kyle and their baby.  We believe this baby is a “fearfully & wonderfully made” gift from God (Psalm 139) and we look forward to loving this child with them as our first grandchild!

Steph & Kyle in Aspen – looking forward to their first child!

Dear Friends,

I’ve become somewhat reckless in taking my daily blood pressure meds – and in fact, unintentionally skipped my daily dose of meds for several days prior to heading to the lake for our vacation – which has likely created a ‘rebound’ effect for me.  I’ve been struggling with a headache over the weekend whenever I make a sudden movement – even just standing up – or sneezing! (OUCH!)

I have been able to gain relief from the headaches with over-the-county pain meds – and have now had three days of my regular doses of the BP meds – and I think things are beginning to return to normal – but this has been a painful reminder to me that after a year of treatments for a deadly form of cancer, I still have to make wise choices to stay healthy every day!

For the past twelve months – I have prayed and many others have prayed for my health.  My doctors have given me their best. I’m a bit embarrassed that the cause of my pain may have come down to my STUPIDITY in not taking my meds as prescribed!  (There are other meds that you can stop taking without significant risks – but apparently blood pressure meds don’t work that way!  DUH!)

While I am deeply thankful for my health – if I want to stay health and stay alive, I realize it will require me to make good choices on a daily basis.  One of the things I promised myself and my family was that I was going to do what I could to get healthy – eating right, exercising appropriately, and following through on my prescribed treatments.  It requires daily discipline!  DUH!

Today is the first official day of Summer – the “Summer Solstice” – the LONGEST DAY OF THE YEAR!  I look forward to this day for six months every year!  From December 21st (the longest night/shortest day) until this day, the hours of sunlight become greater each day!    This year, in northern Indiana – it will also be one of the warmest days – nearly 96 degrees!

So the good news is … we’ve arrived at the highest point of the Earth’s tilt on it’s axis – thus the longer days in the northern hemisphere!  The bad news is … we’re on our way back down!

But it will take a while – so enjoy the long, warm days of summer kids!  I know I am!  (I love it when the sun doesn’t set until after 9pm and rises around 6am!)

It makes me want to sing …

“From the rising of the sun to its going down … the Lord’s name is to be praised!” – Psalm 113:3 (NKJV)

I serve many roles in my life – in fact I have seven specific “Roles & Goals” that I seek to live by – but my favorite one is being a Father!  My Father’s Day this year was filled with “Faith & Joy” - as both of my girls (Ashley Faith & Stephanie Joy) were home and we had some time together – over lunch at my favorite restaurant – and then at camp, one of my favorite memories with my girls!

Of all the things I get to do in my life – as a pastor, a professor, a leader – being a father is the one I believe is the most important and most fulfilling!  I will never have a more important role/job – than being a dad!   And before the end of the year, becoming a grand-dad!

To be honest, I miss the days when my girls were younger – but I’ve enjoyed every day along the way!  Recently we learned that Stephanie & Kyle will be having a baby later this year (due on Christmas Eve) – what a gift!  

So now … I’m getting ready to be a GRANDPA!  WOW!

I’ve heard from many of my friends that being a grandparent is more fun than being a parent – I can’t wait!  But I also know that being a dad has been very special to me.  I am SO PROUD of both of my girls!  They are both teachers – and are both “rock star” camp counselors this week with our Senior High Students for “That Thing” Camp @ Epworth Forest!

Stephanie & Ashley – thanks for making my Father’s Day special this year!

I’m honored to be your old dad!!  (I love your mom too – thanks Kathy for allowing me to be a dad!)

P.S.  

If there are any other dad’s reading this … don’t miss this important role in your life!  Being a dad is the most important thing you will ever do!  Don’t miss the opportunity to love your kids well!  (Love their mother well too!  They will be blessed by that more than you know!)

SRB

I’ve been rocked by God’s grace and wrecked in worship these past two days!

I am attending the Indiana Annual Conference of the United Methodist Church being held at the Convention Center in Indianapolis.  In my earlier years of ministry in this beloved fellowship of churches, I was content to come late and leave early – but in the past year I have come to deeply appreciate the clergy covenant of which I am part in the United Methodist Church.  Because of theological battles and disconnections with the General Church bureaucracy over the years, I have sometimes been less than enthused about the United Methodist church – when we seem to behave more “unTIED” than “UNITed” – but in the past twelve months – and over the past 27 years – since I was ordained in the church of my childhood and youth – I have come to appreciate our “methodist” mess of a church!

We gained the name “methodist” early in the history of our movement – more as a derogatory statement about our founder, John Wesley’s vigilant attention to being “methodical” about following Christ!  Our ‘systems’ are quite ‘methodical’ as well – we even publish an update book every four years after our General Conference which outlines “the way we methodically do church.”  I have too often seen this as a set of rules – instead of the great guide it has been for our faith and practice!  Recently, I’ve become quite the fan of “systems thinking” and now I have a grudging appreciation for our “methodical” church – which is actually the result of the formation of three great Christian traditions in the “new World” – the Methodist Church, the Evangelical Association, and the United Brethren Church.  Prior to 1968 the EA and the UB came together to form the EUB church – and in 1968 they joined in (and were largely absorbed by the larger ME church to become the UMC – the United Methodist Church (carrying the tradition of the Methodist and Evangelical United Brethren Church – even in the “United” name.)

It was through the influence of this church that I came to know about the grace of God in my life – at a UM Church Camp when I was twelve years old (in 1972.)  Now 40 years later (yep, I’m 52 now!) I am honored to serve as a pastor in this great historic denomination.  We are not perfect – but we are good!  Sometimes we are not “united” – but we are always “methodical!”  This is the church that nurtured me as a child – provided Christian community in camp environments where I grew in my understanding of God’s grace – and then later, graciously “called me out” and “set me apart” for the ministry of the gospel of Jesus Christ!  Some of my friends who were ordained with me are now retiring – or have already retired!  I believe I am “technically eligible” for retirement now – having faithfully served over 20 years in pastoral ministry.  When that day comes, if it does, my family will be well provided for because this great denomination, “methodically” required the churches I serve to set aside funds in an investment account for my retirement.  And when my health went into a crisis last year, the “expensive insurance program” that I often complained about (forgive me Lord – and colleagues) has provided remarkable coverage for my extensive medical bills!  But even greater are the friendships and ministry partnerships of my colleagues in the United Methodist Church.

One year ago when I was unable to attend Annual Conference because of my recovery from brain surgery, I was being prayed for by these friends and my Bishop!  By God’s grace as I have been able to attend this year’s conference, I have been approached by countless people, many who I have not known personally, who have expressed their continued support for me in prayer and have rejoiced with me in God’s grace in my life!

Tonight’s evening session was the time for our Conference clergy and lay delegates to gather for a service of Holy Communion – which was led by our Bishop Mike Coyner (I love and respect my Bishop – I’m honored to serve under his wise and gracious leadership!)  Tomorrow I will be “appointed to return to Fort Wayne to serve another year as the lead pastor of Sonrise Church.  What a privilege – what an honor – to be entrusted to “take authority & preach the Word as the pastor of a local church under apostolic authority!  WOW!

I’ve also been reminded again – as I have throughout this past year – that …

… I am simply a “broken jar of clay” (2 Corinthians 4:7) – that God has been willing to fill with the “treasure” of the gospel of grace!  (I’m just a “cracked pot” – and I’ve got the scar to prove it!)  

… It’s not about me!  It’s all about Him!  In fact, His power is made perfect in my weakness!  (2 Corinthians 12:9)

… I must decrease … he must increase! (John 3:30)

I have noticed that it is tempting as a pastor of a larger church to let our ego become too big – in fact, I’ve noticed the bigger the church, quite often the bigger the ego of the pastor!  I don’t want to be that kind of leader – I want to be like John the Baptist and Paul the Apostle.  I stand in a great line of splendor – of faithful leaders who have handed down to me this privilege – and increasingly I realize it is my job to prepare to hand this treasure of the gospel on to the next generation.  This is why I’ve started more intentionally mentoring younger pastors – and had the privilege to meet with a couple of them even today!  I want to ‘speak into them’ as those who have gone before have spoken in to my life.

In addition to watching several of my mentors in ministry “retire” in the past few years, I’ve also attended the funerals of some of them – seeking to honor those who have gone before me and invested in me. (This past year this included funerals for Bishop Sheldon Duecker who started the church I grew up in as a child in Muncie, Indiana – and Willis Gierhart who was both my pastor as a young man and later my District Superintendent when I was appointed to start a new church in Fort Wayne, Indiana.)  I am simply running this leg of the race and preparing to hand the baton of leadership on to the next generation of leaders!  I am praying that God will help me grow in a “healthy humility” – not thinking less of myself, just thinking of myself less – and giving God greater glory!  

One more thing that has “surprised me” at this Annual Conference session is how “wrecked” I am by worship!  On the first day in the “clergy session,” we sang the old hymn that I can’t say I always understood … but now I do.  The hymn was, “And Are We Yet Alive?”   It is sung by the clergy who return to Annual Conference – written in the tradition of the wilderness preachers of early American Methodism who risked their lives to ride their horses along their “circuit” of churches (the early multi-site movement) – I was “wrecked” and began to weep as we sang:

And are we yet alive, and see each other’s face?

Glory and thanks to Jesus give for His almighty grace.

 

What troubles have we seen, what mighty conflicts past,

Fightings without, and fears within, since we assembled last!

 

Yet out of all the Lord hath brought us by His love;

And still He doth His help afford, and hides our life above.

 

Let us take up the cross, till we the crown obtain,

And gladly reckon all things loss, so we may Jesus gain.

WOW – with the year I’ve had – and the recent “fightings” within our General Conference gathering – this one just hit me – and the message of grace just overwhelmed me – that God has allowed me to ‘survive’ brain cancer and now I can return to my covenant community of clergy to serve Him more!  WOW!

Then tonight – I was “wrecked” again in worship – just wrecked!  We were preparing for Communion and the young song leader – younger than my own kids I think, led us in the recent version of “Jesus Paid It All” made popular by Kristian Stanfill with these lyrics:

And I hear the Savior say, They strength indeed is small

Child of weakness watch and pray, Find in me thine all in all.

 

Jesus paid it all, all to Him I owe, Sin had left a crimson stain

He washed it white as snow

 

Oh praise the one who paid my debt, And raised this life up from the dead

Oh praise the One who paid my debt, and raised this life up from the dead.

THIS JUST WRECKED ME!  I WAS SINGING THROUGH A PUDDLE OF TEARS … because God’s grace has done this for me – I didn’t deserve it – but I’ve been forgiven (WOW) – he paid the price of my sin – ALL of it!  And this past year – God has RAISED MY LIFE UP FROM THE DEAD!   (wow, wow)

I am one grateful dude – grateful for God’s grace – and grateful for my “connection” to the United Methodist Church!

Thank you Lord! 

SRB

It is the last day of May … it’s gone!  Which means …

… School’s OUT For Summer!

… Camp Season is Coming Soon!

… I’m going SAILING!  (So I may be gone some too!)

I never had the honor of serving in our nation’s military – but I sure appreciate those who have!  My friend, Ron Watts, posted this quote on his Facebook page today – and I thought it was insightful …

“It is, in a way, an odd thing to honor those who died in defense of our country in wars far away. The imagination plays a trick. We see these soldiers in our mind as old and wise. We see them as something like the Founding Fathers, grave and gray-haired. But most of them were boys when they died, they gave up two lives — the one they were living and the one they would have lived. When they died, they gave up their chance to be husbands and fathers and grandfathers. They gave up their chance to be revered old men. They gave up everything for their county, for us. All we can do is remember.” ~ Ronald Reagan, 1985

I’ve also been reflecting this weekend on these words from Scripture:

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us,fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.  - Hebrews 12:1-3 (NIV)

THANK YOU to those who have gone before

     … WE REMEMBER your courage and your sacrifice!